So Im back from my vacation. It's been a couple of days, actually. The first day I got back I did absolutely nothing, then the day after I kinda did nothing again. Yesterday was the first day that I tried working out and writing the last blog post so it was somewhat productive. Now that I'm all settled and just about anti-jetlagged I can start working towards...well, I guess that's the confusing part.
I was explaining my situation to somebody recently and said that I know what I want to be, I know what it takes to get there, now it's just up to me to put the work in. I can't be sure about the first two things, though. Like, do I really know what I want to be? Not really. I know what I want to be involved in. I know what I like doing and what I'm good at compared to other things. But I couldn't tell you right now what my life is going to be like in another 5 years or so. Even if I did know, I couldn't tell you what I needed to do to get to that point. I could work at it every day for a month and still fall short of my goals. I dont know how hard I need to push to get there, honestly. Maybe it's 2 hours a day, but maybe that's not enough. 4 hours would be better, but maybe it would stress me out and I would fall off the wagon. Maybe all it would take is 30 minutes of solid writing mixed with performances and videos. All in all, I serisouly don't know how to go about doing this.
That's okay, though. Nobody in the history of the world has known for certain their own future and I'm no different. I guess I just have to trust that I'm at least close to the truth with my plan, that working every day towards something is better than what a lot of people out there are doing, that being introspective this morning may or may not help me but at least it's something. So now, like many many other posts on this dumb personal blog, I will make a concious effort to break off and see what I can actually work on as opposed to just rambling and meta-writing.
I would lke to make another smash skit soon. It would be good to have a collection of them or something. The one I saw the other day about the dad finding out you play smash was so fucking terrible and it honestly made me angry. It was bad acting, slow, and had that obvious click-bait title. But they're out there, man. They're making stuff. I can't be angry if other content creators are successful just because I am not. I guess I just need to be working on my own stuff too.
I think the top 20 diss rap is the next thing on my agenda. Let me get some coffee and knock this shit out.
