Getting my girlfriend to make out with her friend

I like to think i don't fill the male stereotype in a lot of negative ways but i definitely do. I think being a guy comes with these things we do that we have no control over. 

Kinda like morning wood, but conscious thought.

 For example, when I pee at my girlfriend's place, a house with all women, I leave the toilet seat up 100% of the time, without fail. I don't mean to. I get punished for it every time. But  I still just black out every time I use the toilet and end up pissing off my girlfriend. That is such a typical guy thing.


 Another thing I cant stop doing is bother my girlfriend into  making out with her friends, as often as possible.

 It's not that i'm being super weird about it, I think they're pretty close to doing it already, without my meddling,
and I just jump on the opportunities to help out immediately.


It's a thought that every guy with a girlfriend ever has had. One of your gal pal's's gal pal's comes running up to her. *Running* they hug and they talk this close to each other. Their chests touch, and you just stare straight ahead because you're not sure if you're allowed to look. *Peek*.

 This is when I step in, and try to make things happen. At first I would just flat out tell them, and they could sense how desperate I was. "Please, kiss!" *homeless*. That didn't work at all, you can't be that obvious. You gotta play it like inception, otherwise, even if they do listen to you, it's just a peck and it's over and what's the point then, right? I know it sounds totally slimy but like, come on, I want this.

Anyway, subliminal messages are the way to go. Lately whenever I'm at a bar or something, I'm with my girl and we're dancing, I'll try to just get the point across without her even noticing.

*Music bumping* x9 *Shouting, away from mic* "LGBT"  "Orange is the new black"  "You get used to the taste"

I'm kidding, I don't do that shit.


I still definitely just yell at them to hook up. I'm like "Hey babe, Is that Cynthia, you know what time it is!!! Kiss her!! Kiss Kiss Kiss! Scissoring looks fun! I Love Lesbians!!!

I think I'm making progress.








 you gotta be play it like the game of thrones.


 Be sneaky about it, plant some seeds.